You showed me
When I was young just how to grow
You showed me
Everything that I should know
You showed me
Just how to walk without your hands
'Cause mom you always were
The perfect fan
-Backstreet Boys

i couldnt even look my own parents in the eye.

mom: you didnt want to do the work?
me: *nod*
mom (softly): *sigh* that was my problem with chad...
me: *wince* ...
my brother dropped out of college. dont think that i regard him any less though. i still hold him in the highest respect. kung may aangal, makakatikim kayo sa 'kin.

its was hot. i sat on the rug at mom's feet. dad came in through the front door. i remembered how about an hour ago he half-slammed it on the way out. he was trying to control his anger. he hovered above me a while. i had my head bowed, not daring to raise it. then he handed me a glass of cold halo-halo he just bought on the way home. i blinked, reached up and took it.

i've got great folks.

and great friends. (you know who you are.)

it rained. i went out. kaiser followed me. i chased him around the driveway for a while. then i stopped... and just stood in the rain, looking up at the sky...

i recall dreams... of a girl with black wings... black because the blood on them was too thick, too dark. and no matter how much the rain poured down upon them... the blood wouldnt wash away. but it would at least disguise the tears... so people couldnt see them.