The stars will cry
The blackest tears tonight
And this is the moment that I live for
I can smell the ocean air
And here I am
Pouring my heart onto these rooftops
Just a ghost to the world
That's exactly
Exactly what I need
-Story of the Year

pain.

i grew so used to it. got so tired of it. so i figured i might as well learn to love it.
and i did.

but...
its not like i wanted things to turn out that way.

i guess i thought it would be easier...

fucking masochist.

pain became a part of me.

...

yknow... i actually dont like making promises... coz i've dissapointed too many people too many times too many ways...

but i still make them...
and i still try to keep them...

...

pain... was disappearing from my life...

it was alien to me.

i caved... i broke the promise.

and i got more than a cut on my wrist...
when i hurt her...that tore at my heart.

...

when she asked me to smile... i wanted to... for her.

i tried...

maybe... for some fleeting moment it was real.

but i ended up hurting her again.

...

yet after all that...

i believe i've discovered just how much she loves me.