This is the last smile
That I’ll fake for the sake of being with you
-Linkin Park

i dunno what to make of it anymore.

that whole week she was absent from school, life suddenly became much easier. i could get though a day without the thought of punching the window beside me ever crossing my mind... i didnt need to fight myself to keep my promise. part of me wants to sever myself from her. but she's tied to my other friends... more than i am. i would risk being the loner again. part of me wouldnt mind. part of me doesnt want that.

and part of me, after everything, was still worried sick about her during that week.